I have weird thoughts in my head all the time. Some of them were quite bizarre like how a herd of Diplodocus will tangle their long necks when they check out a female Diplodocus. Or other female dinosaurs, for that matter. I know, please don’t judge me. Anyway, I was thinking an appropriate speech material for my Toastmasters speech project and the thought of time travel came to my head. So, if I had a chance to meet my younger self, these are some of the advices I would want to tell her.
#1 You should have run away from home when you had the chance.
As a child, whenever I was scolded by my parents; the first thought was to pack my bag and run away. Such a drama queen I know. So, I remember packing this brown bag that I have with my clothes, my Enid Blyton books (they were hardbacks and really heavy! ) and my Barney coin bus (Its a bus like with wheels money box). And I will count my notes and coins. Hmmm, 17 ringgit and 35 cents; that should be enough to take me from KL to Penang (my hometown). In a flight. Okay, set! A couple of hours later, my parents being the sweetest parents they are, had to apologize, kiss and hug me. Then we are all good. I will unpack my bag and shove everything back into the closet. Next time I will definitely do it, I said. I am not suggesting I should run away because my current life is miserable. I thought it would be a fun experience to share with my grandkids.
#2 You will never have a boyfriend if you beat guys up or staple their ears
The later was of course, a joke! I mean who would do such a thing?! Although, in my defense; he asked for it and it just breaks my heart to not give the poor boy a free piercing. When I was young, I have this huge ego issue. I just will not back down especially with guys. I use my power as a prefect and Enid Blyton books as my weapon to “teach them boys some lessons”. I am not exactly proud of it now but then, those guys will never get near me. So, it is somewhat an effective ‘jerk repellant’. And also the ‘nice guys repellant’ at the same time. Sigh. So, maybe you should go easy on the bullying and the stapling.
#3 Aunties are nice to you because they want you to marry their sons
Very self explanatory. Although not all the time, but in most cases its pretty applicable. When I was younger, I used to be so happy when older people ask me how’s my studies, what I plan to do etc. Why? Because I feel that I am in the league kinda thing. I mean, the thought of them finding me a matured, interesting and an intelligent young lady kinda gave a nice stroke to my ego and boost my confidence a bit. Maybe they do feel that I am all that but they did not be nice to me for just that.
I know this match making business is a viable option for some people but I am not a fan. Phewhhh. Glad I put it out there. Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying it is unacceptable its just not my cuppa tea. Ergo, if you dear younger self is reading this; do watch out. 😉
#5 Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder is a scam
Especially in these modern days, the term “beauty” is shaped by the media. Apparently, its skinny, long legged, fair, flawless face etc. Clue: grab the magazine near you and flip through to get a rough idea. I always thought that beauty should vary as people express themselves differently. With the diversity of culture, lifestyle and most importantly genetics; there can never be one true definition of beauty. Although Oxford dictionary suggest that beauty is: A combination of qualities, such as shape, colour, or form, that pleases the aesthetic senses, especially the sight.
Technically, it does suggest that beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. Do take note please dear younger self, try not to succumb to the media influence on what beauty is and should be despite the fact that the temptation is pretty hard to ignore. Got it?
Okay folks, that’s it! Yeah, yeah I skipped #4. Big whoop. Come on, get over that.
xoxo, Nadia Ismadi