Of Unifi, La Senza and Nasi Lemak.

If I can name two things that I find most entertaining it would be the conversations I have with Ellen Degeneres and Dina Osman. The earlier mostly happened in my head and the later is my mum on a daily basis.

This happened yesterday. Let’s set the scene: We were in the car (She was driving because I hate driving and my license had expired) heading to somewhere (not important). She was on the phone and I had no idea what the person on the other end was saying but I assumed it went like this:
Mr / Mrs X: Ini Puan Dina Osman?
Mama : Ye, Saya Dina Osman. 
Mr / Mrs X: Puan Nak upgrade unifi tak? To a better, faster and more reliable package?
Mama: Kalau upgrade tu bayor berapa? (everytime she answers the phone, her disguise is always a lovely lady from Negeri Sembilan.) 
Mr / Mrs X: Tak mahal, RM XXX je sebulan.
Mama: Eh, pengsan nak bayor. (again the accent)
Mr/ Mrs X: Anda pasti? ( this person in my head sounded like Jalaluddin Hassan in Who Wants To Be A Millionnaire) 
Mama: Tak payah la dik, akak bukan bisnes juta-juta. Setakat nak ber-pesbuk (I am not quite sure which part of the world this is from) cukup la. Mekasih.
Mr / Mrs X: *dalam hati* kalau sepuluh orang macam ni, pengsang! (I assumed he/she is from Terengganu)
Me and my grandma couldn’t stop laughing. What an entertaining day. 
Another scene a while back. My mum was trying to be “isteri mithali” by packing my dad some nasi lemak before he went to work,
Mama: Mana paper bag, nak letak? Yang ni je lah. (Putting the tupperware into a pink polkadot paper bag with a huge ‘La Senza’ label on it)
Me: Seriously Ma? 
Mama: Ala, takpe ayah tak tahu pun paper bag ni paper bag apa. 
(Imagining another scene in my head)
Ayah will be walking out of his car, all macho and manly. Took the paper bag with the delicious nasi lemak in it. People will probably be asking: ‘Amboih Dr beli apa tu?’ *cheeky smile* and my dad will innocently reply ‘nasi lemak’ *happy grin*.
Me: *sigh* Poor him. 
Nadia Ismadi

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